Music video by Slick Rick performing Children’s Story. (C) 1988 The Island Def Jam Music Group
Children’s Story - A Story
In one of my classes in college, way back in 2005, we had to develop a character. I chose to take the lyric’s from Slick Rick’s “Children’s Story”, and write out a wider story about the main character in that song. I recently found the tale while digging through old files on my computer, and thought I’d share. Does this count as my one and only fanfiction? I feel like it does. Listen to the song first, though! It’s one of the greatest songs ever, serious business.
"It was never my fault, honestly.
It was all that stupid kid. He told me to do it. He told me it would be fun, and that nobody would ever catch us. It all sounded well and good, you know – snatch up a bag here and there – they were old people, nobody would ever know it was us…we would run up, do what we had to do, and be off again.
But it turned out to be simpler than that. Nobody ever tried to fight back, nobody ever tried to make a scene – they just kind of gave up and let us run off with their money. Old ladies especially. Besides, they would have never guessed that it was me behind the mask anyways – not in this town. Everybody knew me; the tall, handsome kid who played basketball on Saturdays and soccer on Sundays. The kid who, in fourth grade, almost set the city hall on fire because of an Independence Day fireworks mishap. No - they had no idea. I was a good kid,
I was THE good kid.
Until that stupid kid showed up. I should have never listened to him, but the deal sounded so good. It was, too. So good, in fact, that I just couldn’t stop. I would try, I really would, but there was so much money to be made, and it was so easy to get. My parents were never strapped for cash, and I never wanted for anything in life, I didn’t need the money. But that rush that I would get just before a hit – that was what I needed. Sure, I knew it was wrong, but like I said, nobody ever guessed that it was me.
We usually did it together – me and that other kid…but he almost got caught one night, and after that he gave it up.
Not me though. I didn’t need him. Honestly, he kind of slowed me down. So I went on alone, picking people at random, usually late at night, and taking whatever cash they happened to be carrying with them. Some people would start to cry, others would just start shaking, but I never actually hurt any of them. There was no need for that.
How I came across the gun, I don’t know. I just found it one day in my house – I knew my dad had one, but he had never told me where it was. I had never asked, actually – no need for it. But I was looking in the basement for something and I just…saw it there. Now, I was never actually going to use it, but, you know, it looked kind of cool, and intimidating. Word had been getting around that there was a pickpocket, and it was only a matter of time before somebody tried to fight back. So, I figured I could just flash it around a bit, put on a little show in order to get the money and move on.
But tonight I screwed up, and I screwed up bad.
The guy looked normal enough – you know, nothing fancy, but as soon as I got close to him he grabbed me, and next thing I knew the wind was knocked out of me and I was doubled over on the ground.
I don’t know why I pulled out the gun, I really don’t. I never wanted to hurt anyone, I swear. I should have never trusted that stupid kid. The next thing I remember is pointing the gun straight at the man’s gut – the man who, as it turned out, was an undercover cop out looking for me.
They had set a trap and I had fallen for it like a mouse falls for cheese.
I knew as soon as I saw the gun in my hand, pressed against his stomach, that I had made a huge mistake. I was going to end up in jail – and for more than petty thievery. I took off running as fast as I could, and as I did I could hear him on his radio, calling for backup. I ran for the subway, but there was another cop there – a woman – and she fired. She fired! At me! That was the point at which I panicked and…and fired back. I missed, thankfully, but I knew there would be no turning back. So I just kept running, and ended up with…here, with Dave.
Dave, the dope fiend.
Nobody ends up with Dave.
I ended up In a smelly old building, sitting next to the town’s biggest drug dealer. He is the walking definition of disgusting. He smells bad, he looks like a dirty hippie, and all I want to do is get away from the cops. But my gun is empty, and I have feeling that I might need to use it again. That’s where Dave comes in. Everybody knows that dope fiends have all the goods.
I’m sure the cops are close by, so I should probably get going. Honestly, I don’t really know where to go. I imagine I’ll just keep running until they catch me or until I get away, but it’s obvious that I’m screwed either way.
I should have never listened to that stupid kid.”